The Futility Infielder

Every baseball fan has his or her own favorite harbinger of spring, their own signal that a frigid winter without breaking balls, bunts, and box scores is on the wane. For Mike Carminati over at Mike's Baseball Rants, that harbinger arrived yesterday in the form of the year's first Joe Morgan Chat Day on ESPN.com. In verse which could give the Score Bard a run for his money (and which easily surpasses my own since-revoked poetic license), Mike even waxed poetic in anticipation of Morgan's return:

These are the gladdest of possible words:
"Joe Morgan Chat Day tomorrow."
Reductio ad absurdum, his facts fleetly blurred,
Joe Morgan Chat Day tomorrow
Ruthlessly promulgating gonfalon babble,
Making a giant hit with the ole rabble--
His words numb your brain like a bad game of Scrabble:
"Joe Morgan Chat Day tomorrow!"

With the blessed day finally arriving, Mike explains his glee in more detail:

We—I can't decide if that's the royal We or I'm schizophrenic, and so am I—here at Mike's Baseball Rants love the Joe Morgan and we love the Joe Morgan Chat Days even more. Joe was the greatest second baseman we've ever seen... But as a baseball analyst, Joe is the most infuriating in the business. He is not as execrable as the di-a-bo-lical sab-o-tag-E (to quote Bugs) that is being perpetrated during a Steve Lyons-Thom Brennaman broadcast. Joe is far more subtle and insidious. He can make a great point followed by one of the most inane and backward statements you will ever hear. Sometimes he does both at the same time. This is JMCD nirvana for the initiated.

As he always does, Carminati goes to great and often humorous lengths in analyzing Morgan's responses. This one finds him agreeing with Morgan more than usual, especially with regards to the recent Veterans Committee Hall of Fame vote. Still Morgan uncorks some wild ones, and Mike dutifully chases them to the backstop. Fun stuff.